


3 am

by kevinluvr



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Friends to Lovers, Jealousy, M/M, Mutual Pining, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-07-13
Packaged: 2020-03-02 20:43:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 10,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18818659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kevinluvr/pseuds/kevinluvr
Summary: kevin and jacob are both music students with insomnia, they end up running into each other frequently on sleepless nights.ORkevin and jacob are both so oblivious and kevin is very bad at hiding his jealousy





	1. sugar spice and everything nice

the dorm is dead silent. kevin has been sprawled on the couch for several hours. he tosses and turns but he doesn’t even feel slightly tired. he just wants to scream, knowing that he’ll be exhausted in the morning. _why can’t he just sleep at night like everyone else?_ he blinks up at the ceiling a few times before deciding to amble around the dorms. he frequently does this, it at least clears his mind a little bit. kevin throws on a sweatshirt and quietly leaves his dorm. his roommate and best friend, chanhee, knows about his insomnia but kevin hasn’t told him about how he gets up and wanders around at night. he plans on keeping that a secret. mostly because chanhee tends to be overprotective and would probably freak out about how it’s not “safe”. kevin walks down the stairs to the bottom floor of the dorms, intending on walking around a little and then going back up. it’s pretty dark but there’s enough light to see and kevin doesn’t mind the dark anymore. oddly, he hears the clattering of pans coming from the communal kitchen and the sound of someone’s sweet singing. almost subconsciously, he creeps around the corner towards the sound and is greeted by a boy screaming and throwing a spoon at him, which hits his stomach before clattering to the floor.

“what the fuck!” kevin hisses. 

“oh my god i’m so sorry i thought you were a ghost.” the other boy runs across the kitchen and turns on a light. “i got cookie batter on you i’m really sorry” the boy panicks. 

“wow thanks i didn’t notice that.” kevin mutters sarcastically. 

after a few minutes, the boy scurries back with a handful of napkins. “here.” kevin looks up at him for the first time and stares for a little too long. the boy is engulfed in a grey sweatshirt way too big for him and has tossled blonde hair and dark, wide eyes. 

“are you going to take them?” the boy looks pointedly at the napkins.

now it’s kevin’s turn to be embarrassed. “oh... yeah.” he awkwardly takes the napkins from the other boy and wipes the cookie bits off of his sweatshirt as best as he can.

“i’m jacob by the way, i think i’ve seen you before in music theory. i’m sorry our first meeting had to be like this” the boy says, smiling at kevin.  _ how have i never noticed him before?  _ kevin wonders. but then again, music theory is his first class and he’s usually only half awake for it. 

“i'm kevin, and don’t worry about it.” kevin smiles back at him, feeling guilty for snapping at jacob earlier. this causes jacob to grin even wider and holy shit he has a beautiful smile, his entire face lights up when he smiles and his eyes twinkle.

“you can stay and make these chocolate chip cookies with me if you want, it’s pretty late though.” jacob offers.

kevin snorts, “trust me, 3 am is nothing.”

“well here’s the recipe i'm following,” jacob says, handing kevin his phone. “you can turn on some music too.” 

kevin smiles, already searching for beyonce songs.  “are you serious? you have no beyonce on your phone?” 

“we just met and you’re already criticizing my music? i can’t believe you.” jacob puts a hand over his chest and pretends to be offended. 

“i’ll just use my own phone.” kevin dramatically sighs, playing along. right when he turns on partition he starts dancing around the kitchen enthusiastically with the spoon in his hand. jacob bursts out laughing and erupts in applause at kevin’s little performance. kevin is so glad he decided to come downstairs. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is my first time posting my writing so im sorry if it’s really messy


	2. time flies

it’s 8am and kevin can’t stop smiling. chanhee deliberately sighs loudly when he sees kevin laying on the couch on his phone. 

“kevin did you sleep at all last night?” 

kevin slowly shakes his head, knowing that chanhee is going to be disappointed. he got back to the dorm at 5am and he and jacob had exchanged phone numbers  and texted the rest of the night.

chanhee shoves a cup of coffee at kevin.  “try not to fall asleep in class, okay?” 

kevin throws up his hands and shrugs. “i’ll try.” 

“now come on we’re going to be late!” chanhee whines, practically dragging kevin out the door.

they meet up with eric and juyeon in the hallway. chanhee and kevin exchange glances when eric’s gaze lingers on juyeon for a bit too long or when juyeon laughs hysterically at eric’s jokes which aren’t even that funny. it’s painful how oblivious the two of them are. as soon as they part ways, kevin shoots chanhee an exasperated look.

”i can’t stand being around them, someday i’m going to make those two confess already.” 

“it’s not like you have a great love life either,” chanhee smirks. 

“man shut up why do you always have to rub in the fact that you have a boyfriend?” 

“it’s okay you’ll get one too.... maybe by the time you graduate.” 

“i really hate you.” kevin retorts. 

the professor arrives and kevin takes his normal seat next to chanhee in the back of the room. 

“so for your final exam you will be composing your own song. you can work alone or in a group of two. your finished product is due by the last day, may 25th. you will submit an audio recording of you performing your song. i’m going to give you this time to figure out a plan.”

as soon as she stops talking, kevin hears someone yell his name and glances across the classroom to see jacob waving him over. kevin makes his way over and chooses to ignore the voice in the back of his head saying that jacob looks even prettier in the full light. 

“i know we just met yesterday but i was wondering if you wanted to do the project together? i don’t know anyone else in this class and i’d prefer to have someone to work with,” jacob says. 

“of course!” kevin replies without hesitation.

”sweet! what time would work best?” 

“it really doesn’t matter to me we can work on it whenever.”

”you can just come over to my dorm after all your classes if you want, my roommate sunwoo is usually with his boyfriend anyways,” jacob offers.

”yeah, sure,” kevin nods, already looking forward to it.

 

 

jacob and sunwoo’s dorm is kind of a mess, but in a comfortable way. there’s guitar picks and sheets of music scattered across one of the tables along with animes and cheesy romance movies on the floor, which jacob insists are sunwoo’s. 

“where should we even start?” jacob wonders, brushing some of the papers off of the table to make room. 

“well you play the guitar, right? you can play that and i can play the piano,” kevin suggests. he notes the pages on the floor filled with what appears to be song lyrics. “jacob, do you write?” 

jacob nods shyly, “yeah... a little. just when there’s something on my mind. what about you?” 

“only a couple times when things were especially hard.”

”well we can write it together,” jacob says decisively, pulling two pens out of his bag.

 

 

jacob slams his pen down and lets out a scream of excitement. “i think we did it!”

”this is probably the best thing i’ve ever wrote.” kevin leans back and smiles, admiring their work.

”you're a really good lyricist kevin, i can tell these lyrics mean a lot to you.” 

“so are you, you should honestly put a song out there someday.” the words hardly leave kevin’s mouth before jacob is squashing him in a hug. it’s unexpected, and kevin laughs a little but it feels right, jacob is warm and smells like coffee and caramel. 

“no one’s ever said that before,” jacob mumbles.

“really? i don’t believe you.” kevin ignores the way that his heart feels like it’s jump-roping at the close proximity of him and a boy he just met. god he hates it so much. just then the door of jacob’s dorm opens and a boy with dark orange, wavy hair walks in. 

”jacob what are you doing with a boy in here at 3 am?” 

jacob immediately jumps away from kevin. “is it seriously 3 am?” 

the boy makes a face, “you literal dumbass. do you ever check the time?” 

“where were you then?” jacob asks, raising an eyebrow.

”one of hak’s friends was having a party. now please wrap up whatever the fuck is going on here i want to watch a movie.” the boy wanders off into another room.

”i’m sorry about sunwoo... he’s seen me through a few toxic relationships so he’s always skeptical of new people,” jacob frowns.

”it’s okay, i’ll get going.” kevin offers a small smile and starts out the door.

”sleep well!” jacob calls after him.

 _i wish_ kevin thinks. 

 

 

 


	3. you’re different

“GOOD MORNING!” an enthusiastic eric yells as soon as chanhee opens the door. he’s practically bouncing up and down. 

“it’s way too early in the morning to be this excited,” kevin sighs, rubbing his eyes.

“i’m having a party tomorrow for the last day!” eric grins. “invite whoever you want i want it to be huge.” he then proceeds to walk further down the hall and yell at other students, which surprisingly doesn’t earn much of a reaction since they all know eric by now. 

as soon as he is out of earshot, kevin decides to make a bold statement. “i’m making juyeon confess to him tomorrow.” 

“kevin you can’t be serious, how are you going to pull that off?” chanhee eyes him skeptically. 

“i’ll think of something, chanhee, you know how hard it is to watch.” 

“if you can get that boy to confess you’d be a hero.” 

kevin feels his phone buzz in his jeans. it’s a text from jacob.

 

_**jacob:** we can record during this class so if u want to come over and record i’ll be here! bring ur keyboard :)  _

 

“what are you smiling at kev?” chanhee smirks. “is it that boy from class?” 

kevin feels his throat tighten. “n-no it’s nothing.” 

“OH MY GOD, KEVIN HAS A CRUSH!” chanhee squeals, causing a few girls to give them weird looks. 

“shut up we’re just friends!” kevin tries to fight off the blush he knows he has.

“if you don’t make him your boyfriend right now then i’m going to kick you out of our dorm.” 

“we don’t even know eachother that well yet. besides there’s no way he doesn’t have a girlfriend or something.” 

“girlfriend?” 

“not everyone is gay, chanhee.” 

“but jacob bae is like the second gayest person in this school, kevin. you really have no idea, do you?” 

“who’s number one?” 

“yours truly!” chanhee grins, striking a pose.

“remind me why we’re friends again.”

“anyways, what did jacob want?” chanhee’s eyes glitter teasingly. 

“we’re going to record our song now.” 

“funny how mozart hasn’t released any new music since this collab.”

kevin snorts. chanhee might be really overprotective and tease him a lot, but he’s an incredible friend and he wouldn’t trade him for anyone else. 

 

 

jacob already has his guitar over his shoulder when he lets kevin into the dorm. he’s wearing a flannel and black skinny jeans and even though it’s just a regular day outfit, suddenly kevin feels like nothing in his tucked-in oversized t-shirt and ripped jeans. 

“you can just set your keyboard down here.” jacob helps kevin set up the keyboard next to his chair and drags over a seat for kevin. 

“i’m nervous.” kevin sighs, even though he knows it probably isn’t the recording that’s making him nervous. 

“don’t be, you have the best voice i’ve ever heard.” jacob smiles at him reassuringly. 

“wait... really?” kevin’s heart is beating so fast he feels like the entire campus can hear. 

“definitely.” 

kevin doesn’t know what to say, his thoughts are starting to jumble. he’s never received compliments on his voice like this before, except from chanhee and that’s what best friends are supposed to say. 

“well i’m passing on the title to you.” he wants to disappear as soon as he says it, but the way that jacob looks down and tries to hide his smile makes it worth it. 

 

 

 

after many takes they finally have a recording they’re both satisfied with. 

“TAKE 100!” jacob yells, pumping his fists in the air. 

“we’re gonna have to cut that now.” kevin whines, pushing jacob and trying to suppress his laughter. 

“you’re laughing though.” jacob teases, pushing back. 

“hey, jacob?” kevin suddenly remembers about eric’s big party.

“yeah?” 

“my friend is having a party tomorrow for the end of the school year, if you want to come. my other friends will probably ditch me for their boyfriends.” kevin says, recalling having to drag a drunk chanhee and changmin out of parties numerous times. 

“of course, i know what that’s like.” jacob pulls a face. “i hate going to parties with sunwoo and haknyeon.” 

“starting now we won’t be bored at parties anymore!” kevin cheers. 

“yes!” jacob highfives him.

 

“don’t y’all have class?” 

kevin and jacob whip around to see sunwoo standing in the doorway.

“don’t you?” jacob prompts. 

“i forgot my book. anyways, jacob, sangyeon is looking for you.”

jacob’s face falls, but he gets up anyways and looks apologetically back at kevin. everyone at their school knows sangyeon, he’s popular and cute and kevin gets an uneasy feeling in his stomach because sangyeon is so much better than him.  _i really do have no chance_ kevin  thinks. 

 

 

after jacob is gone, kevin starts to pack up his keyboard and put the chairs back where they belong. sunwoo is in his bedroom and after several crashing sounds there’s a scream of success and he re-emerges with a textbook. 

kevin opens up the door to leave and is stopped by a quiet “wait” from sunwoo. heslowly turns around, feeling nervous because he remembers jacob telling him sunwoo is skeptical of new people. 

“what’s your name?” 

“kevin.” 

“jacob probably already told you but i’m sunwoo.. i’m sorry about the other night.” 

“jacob told me why and it’s okay.”  _ what made him apologize?  _ kevin wonders. 

“you’re different... i can tell.” 

“wha-“ before kevin can even ask what he means sunwoo pushes him out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m sorry for the slow update i’ve been really busy with school and vacation and i wrote this on the plane so it’s kinda messy :(


	4. kevin moon the wingman

“there’s no way we got a perfect score,” jacob stares at kevin dumbfounded. 

“you can see for yourself, i’m not lying.” kevin says, also feeling quite shocked. 

“this is insane. i don’t know of anyone else in class who got a perfect score.” 

 “i told you you were an amazing lyricist!” kevin grins.

“okay but it wasn’t all me, so this means you have to accept that you’re an amazing lyricist too.”

kevin doesn’t know how much longer he can stand it. jacob has no idea how much hope it gives him when he says things like that, and kevin doesn’t want to be hopeful because he doesn’t want to end up disappointed. 

“KEVIN!!” a bright orange-haired boy sprints over to where kevin and jacob are standing in the library. the librarian shoots the trio a glare. 

“changmin you cant just yell in the middle of the library!” kevin whispers exasperatedly. 

“chanhee told me you got a perfect score on your music final!!” changmin is grinninglike he just won the lottery and kevin wonders how chanhee’s annoying ass ever got this nice of a boyfriend. 

“it wasn’t just me, jacob’s probably the one who got us all the points.” kevin motions towards jacob, who changmin somehow hasn’t noticed standing next to him.

“oh? who’s jacob? we’ve never met before.” 

it’s a simple question but kevin knows exactly what changmin means by it and jacob probably does as well, kevin notices him shift awkwardly. 

“jacob is my friend, we just met recently.” 

“well, hello kevin’s friend.” changmin puts an extra emphasis on “friend” and kevin is reminded once again of how alike changmin and chanhee are. if jacob notices it, he chooses to ignore it and gives changmin a friendly wave.  

“well, i’m going to go get ready for eric’s party tonight, good job on your song!” changmin exclaims a little loudly, earning a “SHHHH!” from the librarian. kevin and jacob agree and follow him.

 

  

 

when kevin walks out in a yellow striped shirt and denim jeans the first thing chanhee says is, “oh my god for once you don’t look homeless.” 

“you don’t look too bad yourself,” kevin replies, even though the truth is that chanhee doesn’t look bad at ALL. ever. kevin used to be jealous of him for it when he was younger but now he just chooses to pride himself in having such a stunning best friend. for this party, chanhee is wearing a baby pink sweater that matches the eyeshadow he applied. kevin is already looking forward to seeing changmin glare at all the people who are going to take interest in chanhee like at every other party they go to. 

 “what’s your plan for juyeon?” chanhee asks as they walk to eric’s dorm.  

“honestly... i haven’t really thought about it.”  

“this is never going to work kevin, especially if you don’t even have a good plan.” chanhee sighs. 

“we’ve been friends for 10 years and you still don’t trust me?” 

 chanhee doesn’t even get the chance to come up with a witty response because right when they enter the hallway with eric’s dorm they can already hear the music coming from it. changmin is waiting outside the door for chanhee and chanhee enthusiastically dances his way over to him. when changmin opens the door the music blasting from multiple speakers gets even louder and kevin squints amongst all the people to try to find jacob. to his disappointment, he doesn’t see the blonde but he does see juyeon so without even thinking he grabs juyeon’s arm and pulls him aside to where there isn’t many people. 

“kevin... what are you doing?” juyeon eyes him skeptically.

“you need to confess to eric today, juyeon.” 

“what, no!” “wait... how do you know..” 

kevin snorts. “you guys are so obvious about it it’s amazing how neither of you have noticed.” 

 “what do you mean you guys?” juyeon asks, looking genuinely confused.

“oh my fucking god...eric likes you too how can you be so dense?” right after the words leave kevin’s mouth juyeon looks completely panicked and kevin racks his brain for an idea of how juyeon can confess to eric.  

“you know what, you’re right kevin. i’m tired of waiting for him to make the first move. i’m going to tell him right now and i know exactly how to.” 

  _did i just hear him right? _ kevin wonders as he follows juyeon out of the hallway and into the main room where everyone is dancing and drinking whatever concoctions are in the kitchen. juyeon immediately starts running around and turning off every speaker in the dorm, causing a few people to yell out protests when they realize what is happening.

eric, who was dancing in the middle of the crowd, pushes his way through and grabs juyeon. “what are you doing?” 

 kevin spots jacob towards the back and weaves his way over, praying that juyeon knows what he’s doing. 

“everyone, i’m sorry but i have something to say to eric.” juyeon says, turning towards all the people who are now staring at him. 

“hi!” jacob whispers when kevin joins him. he’s wearing a tan sweater with a black jacket over it. his blonde hair is curled slightly and he looks so good that kevin can hardly speak and is relieved when juyeon starts making his confession. 

“eric... i’ve felt this way for a long time and i’ve been too scared to admit it but i can’t just keep this in forever so i’m saying this now.. i like you..”  

there’s a small silence following juyeon’s confession and kevin feels his chest tighten.  _ what if eric actually doesn’t like juyeon and he’s been interpreting it wrong?  _ 

but then eric’s face breaks out into a huge smile. “how have you never noticed before... i like you too idiot.” 

this causes the crowd to erupt in cheers and juyeon’s face turns the shade of kevin’s hair. eric takes him by the hand and they run around laughing and turning all the speakers back on.

“that was really nice what you did over there.” jacob says, turning to kevin. 

“what do you mean?” 

“i saw you talking to juyeon before his confession... you helped him didn’t you?” 

”juyeon thought of that idea himself but yeah, i encouraged him,” kevin nods, following jacob’s eyes to where juyeon and eric are now kissing in the kitchen. 

“they make such a cute couple already,” jacob softly smiles. just then, formation comes on the speakers. “oh god,” jacob sighs, suppressing a smile as kevin already starts enthusiastically dancing towards the center of the room. 

kevin turns around to see if jacob is following, but the blonde is nowhere to be seen. he starts to panic, _what if something bad happened to jacob?_ Then, he catches a glimpse of blonde hair with sangyeon on the opposite side of the room. kevin’s heart sinks in his chest. even though he’s a ways away, he can still see the way sangyeon is behaving around jacob. sangyeon definitely likes jacob. kevin sighs, _why did he have to pick jacob of all people to have his first college crush on?_  

“kevin, beyoncé is playing and you’re not even dancing, what’s wrong?” a boy wearing a black mesh shirt, leather pants, and dangly earrings appears beside kevin. 

“hyunjoon! i feel like i haven’t seen you in ages!” kevin feels slightly better seeing his friend.

 ”i know! but seriously, what’s on your mind?”

kevin doesn’t know why, but he wants to spill everything to hyunjoon. maybe because they really haven’t talked in a while and it’s unlikely that hyunjoon would tell anyone. or maybe just because he needs to get it out. whatever it is, kevin finds himself telling hyunjoon everything and hyunjoon just nods along and listens to his whole rant. 

“kevin... i’m serious right now, you need to win that boy over.”

”it’s not that easy hyunjoon, maybe it is for you but it isn’t for me.” 

“the situation is definitely messy but nothing is impossible.” hyunjoon offers a small smile.  

“thank you,” kevin says, hugging hyunjoon. he then decides to leave, as jacob is still talking to sangyeon and he doesn’t know what to do. as soon as kevin sits down on the couch at his dorm and starts to turn on netflix, he gets a text from jacob. 

 

_** jacob: **  where are you? i was wondering if you wanted to leave, we can just walk back together  _

 

“i thought you were with sangyeon.” kevin types, hating how he’s already opening the door and making his way to eric’s dorm once again. he tries to re-enter the crowd as discreetly as possible.  

“kevin, where were you?” jacob asks, running up to him. 

“i was in the bathroom,” kevin lies, not wanting to let jacob know that he actually left the whole party and came back just to walk with him. they wave goodbye to a few of their friends as they walk out the door.  

“i think sangyeon likes me, i don’t know why though.” jacob says as soon as they get out of eric’s dorm and into the hallway.  

kevin wants to tell him that sangyeon likes him because he’s like a ray of sunshine when he smiles, he has the sweetest voice, he writes the best, most heartfelt lyrics, he has such a kind-heart, he gives the best hugs, and he is stunning. but he can’t. so he just says, “i think he does too.” 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh i don’t know how to feel about this chapter but i hope you guys like it


	5. friends hang out too

it’s the first day of summer break and kevin hasn’t done anything but draw in his room at home. he finds himself subconsciously scribbling things related to jacob or his feelings and having to scrap them because he can’t post something like that anywhere. luckily, all of his friends live close to campus as well so they’ve made some plans over the summer. he’s going bowling with chanhee, changmin, and their friend younghoon tomorrow and jacob’s birthday party is next week. kevin pauses and stares at his newest drawing, chocolate chip cookies. he was definitely thinking of the first night he met jacob when he drew it, but cookies are such a simple thing that no one will know. he picks up his phone to take a picture to post and sees a text from jacob asking if he can come over. _why would he want to hang out with me of all people?_ kevin wonders. but of course, he says that jacob can come over and sends the address. he uploads his drawing, changes into something a little nicer, and runs his hands through his cherry-colored hair a few times before he hears a knock at the door. jacob is wearing a similar sweatshirt to the first night they met except in black and his blonde hair is neatly combed. 

 

“this place is nice,” jacob comments when he steps inside. 

 

“it’s just a simple apartment, you know, broke college student things!” kevin replies, glancing around the room. 

 

jacob nods, “the reason i came is actually because i was wondering if you’d like to go to karaoke, i figured you might since you sing too.” 

 

“that sounds fun, of course!” kevin mentally scolds himself for getting so excited over jacob wanting to go somewhere with him. _this is a friends thing, kevin. friends hang out too._

 

“we can just take my car,” jacob says, smiling widely. 

 

 

 

“one karaoke room please!” jacob says at the counter. kevin fishes his wallet out of his pocket and starts to put down the money but jacob grabs his hand, stopping him. 

 

“i got this,” jacob places down his money instead.

 

“we could have at least split it,” kevin complains while they walk to the room. 

 

“but it was my idea anyways.” jacob insists. kevin accepts his defeat and follows jacob into the karaoke room.

 

“what song?” jacob asks, picking up a microphone. 

 

“hmm... bohemian rhapsody?” 

 

“bohemian rhapsody it is!” 

 

right when the song starts, the two of them get right into character and start dramatically singing in tall voices and throwing their arms about. kevin practically screams the lyrics, making jacob burst out laughing and miss his next line. by the end of the song, they’re both exhausted and giggling and need to take a short break to recollect themselves. they sing many other queen songs, which kevin mostly screams instead of sings. then they start singing disney songs, prancing around the room grinning as they belt their childhood favorites. kevin and jacob both agree while gleefully singing “i’ll make a man out of you” that mulan is a masterpiece. 

 

lastly, they choose to sing “a whole new world.” for some reason, they both immediately turn to each other when the song starts and cheesily grin. even though it’s only a joke, kevin feels a strange surge of boldness and holds eye-contact the entire time. jacob’s eyes are so wide and the light from the karaoke screen makes them glitter. 

 

towards the end of the song, jacob extends his hand dramatically and kevin is quick to take it, letting jacob twirl him around the room. when the song ends, jacob pulls kevin closer to him so his head is resting on jacob’s shoulder. both of the boys are oblivious to the pink hue on the others cheeks. kevin wants to freeze time and stay in this position forever, it just feels so comfortable and right. however, he worries that jacob can feel his rapid heartbeat, so he is the first one to pull away. he immediately misses the warmth and the scent of caramel and coffee.

 

 

 

“that was fun,” jacob says as they climb into his car. “we should do it again sometime.” 

 

kevin’s stomach flutters a little. “i’d totally be down for that,” he says. 

 

“you’ll be at my party next week, right?” jacob asks.

 

“of course, you really thought i’d miss it?” 

 

“good, i’m really glad.” 

 

“will sangyeon be there?” the question slips out before kevin even realizes it. 

 

“what? why?” jacob tightens his grip on the steering wheel.

 

“don’t you have a thing going on?” kevin asks, looking anywhere but at jacob.

 

“why would you think that?” 

 

“well... didn’t you say he liked you?” 

 

“i’m sorry kevin but i really don’t want to talk about this, especially with you.” 

 

“why not with me? do you not trust me?” kevin knows he’s fucked up right when the words leave his mouth. 

 

“seriously, kevin?” is all jacob says in response. 

 

they drive the rest of the way in silence and kevin just stares out the window, trying not to get upset over the awkward silence. _why couldn’t i just stay quiet about it?_ he thinks.

 

when they arrive at kevin’s apartment building he says thank you to jacob, not expecting a response from the blonde, but jacob says softly, “make sure you’re there on friday.” 

 

“i wouldn’t miss it for anything, don’t worry.” kevin offers a small smile. jacob smiles back as he pulls away and kevin lets out a sigh of relief. they’ll be okay. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like this keeps getting worse the more i write :( but thank you to everyone who’s still reading


	6. shooters for kev

kevin is nervous to meet changmin and chanhee’s friend for the first time. they’ve told him all about younghoon and he doesn’t want to make a bad impression. from what he’s heard, younghoon and changmin have a similar relationship to him and chanhee. there’s a knock at the door and when kevin opens it chanhee is grinning and jumping excitedly, his pink hair flopping up and down. kevin can’t help but laugh at the sight. 

 

“you’re certainly excited about this,” he notes. 

 

“of course i am! my best friend is meeting my boyfriend’s best friend for the first time!” he takes kevin’s hand and pulls him through the apartment and downstairs to the car. changmin also looks thrilled about it, his smile is almost as bright as his orange hair. at first, kevin is a little intimidated by younghoon, he’s tall and has intense eyes. but he soon realizes that younghoon is shy and laughs a lot, and he seems nice. 

 

the drive to the bowling alley is full of enthusiasm, they blast twice songs and sing and dance along. the bowling alley is busy, there’s middle school friend groups celebrating the end of the school year, adults reuniting with old friends, elderly people competing, and chanhee, changmin, younghoon and kevin. 

 

“to be honest, i haven’t bowled in a while,” kevin warns nervously. 

 

“don’t worry, chanhee and changmin are absolutely terrible,” younghoon says, bending down to tie his bowling shoes. 

 

“chanhee is worse than me.” changmin looks at chanhee teasingly. 

 

“the way that that is a total lie,” chanhee scoffs. 

 

chanhee is up first. as younghoon predicts, he rolls the bowling ball into the gutter. this causes all of the boys to erupt into laughter, especially changmin. 

 

“chanhee is going to keep the same score the whole game,” younghoon says, pointing at chanhee’s zero on the screen. 

 

“that was literally my first turn asshole,” chanhee retorts, strutting up to throw the ball again. 

 

to his relief, it knocks down a few pins. changmin starts clapping and cheering like chanhee is an olympics gold medalist for knocking down a few pins. changmin and kevin both knock down several pins too. when younghoon gets a strike, chanhee and kevin imitate the cheesy video playing on the screen. younghoon pays no mind and just does a victory dance while calling them amateurs. 

 

halfway through the game, they decide to order pizza. it reminds kevin of when he and chanhee were middle schoolers. he recalls going over to chanhee’s house many days after school and sitting in his room talking or playing games all night. they’d always order cheese pizza and breadsticks. the two of them could eat the entire pizza. in fact, kevin is pretty sure if chanhee wanted to, he could eat the whole thing by himself. 

 

“so kevin, what’s up with that friend of yours? the one you introduced me to,” changmin asks while they take a break to eat their pizza. 

 

kevin stops eating and gives changmin and chanhee awkward glances. 

 

“you don’t have to talk if you don’t want to, but you can trust younghoon if that’s what you’re worried about,” chanhee says. 

 

kevin is actually not worried about younghoon. he’s heard changmin say that younghoon has a boyfriend so he’s sure younghoon would understand. he’s just nervous, jacob is the first person he’s liked in a while and he knows it isn’t going anywhere so he doesn’t want his friends to be disappointed. 

 

“you remember when i had a crush on changmin, right?” chanhee says, trying to make kevin feel more comfortable. 

 

“how could i forget?” kevin smiles. chanhee would never shut up about changmin. kevin was constantly having to either watch or hear about chanhee’s gay panics. chanhee usually carried himself confidently, but around changmin he became a complete mess. _at least i’m more subtle than him_ , kevin thinks. he also remembers when changmin was actually the one to confess to chanhee first and kevin had bought chanhee all of his favorite foods to celebrate. 

 

“this crush isn’t going to lead to anything though.” kevin doesn’t really know whether he meant to say that aloud or not.

 

“you don’t know that,” changmin insists. 

 

“someone else likes him, someone much better than me. and i think he likes them too,” kevin mutters. he looks down, scared of how his friends will react to this news. 

 

“do you know for sure?” 

 

“not really but he won’t tell me what’s going on.” 

 

“then keep trying to get close to him,” changmin says.

 

“if they’re not in a relationship yet then you still have a chance i think,” younghoon adds. 

 

“if he hurts you just let me know and i’ll rip him apart,” chanhee says, taking an aggressive bite out of his pizza slice. 

 

“please... don’t do that,” kevin says, standing up to throw his plate away. the rest of the boys follow him. 

 

“shooters for kev!” changmin exclaims.

 

 

except for one then where changmin throws the bowling ball behind him just like wii bowling, causing chanhee to fall over from laughing so hard, the rest of the game goes normally. younghoon ends up winning, with kevin second and changmin third. they all tease chanhee for finishing last which earns a lot of fuck you’s. 

 

“why don’t we have a group chat for this already?” changmin wonders while they’re driving back. 

 

“make it coward!” younghoon yells from the back seat. 

 

“on it already.” 

 

a few seconds later, kevin sees a message from changmin to a group chat saying “hey gays ;)”

 

he adds younghoon’s phone number to his contacts and smiles as they already start spamming the group chat with fake arguments and cringey emojis. he’s so caught up in it all that he forgets all about jacob and sangyeon. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> younghoon was finally introduced!!


	7. an unexpected meeting

kevin heaves a sigh of frustration. he’s out of coffee beans and it’s almost 3 am. he knows the grocery store nearby is open 24 hours, but going to the grocery store in the middle of the night wasn’t really his plan. he doesn’t have a much of a choice though, he can’t fall asleep and coffee will at least make the tiredness more bearable.

 

the grocery store parking lot surprisingly isn’t completely empty. kevin jogs up to the store and through the automatic doors, trying to make his trip as quick as possible. however, in his rush, he collides with another customer. there’s a thud as all of the bags the customer was carrying fall onto the floor and spill their contents. kevin is quick to bend down and pick up all the items, which all happen to be cereal boxes. this person sure eats a lot of cereal, kevin thinks as he picks up the bags to hand them back. 

 

“i’m so sorry,” he begins, freezing when he sees who the customer is. 

 

jacob’s face breaks out into a grin. “watch where you’re going kevin!” he teases. 

 

“what are the odds that we’re both at the grocery store in the middle of the night?” kevin wonders aloud. 

 

“what are you here to get?” jacob asks.

 

“coffee beans, i just ran out.” 

 

jacob nods, looking deep in thought. “kevin i always wanted to ask... do you have insomnia too?” 

 

kevin feels all of the muscles in his body tense. is it that obvious? 

 

“you know what, i shouldn’t have asked that, i’m so sorry,” jacob begins, but kevin cuts him off. 

 

“yeah, i do... wait did you say you did too?” 

 

jacob nods. 

 

“i’ve never known anyone else who has insomnia before actually,” kevin admits. 

 

“me neither.” 

 

“everything makes sense now though... you know, the night we met and everything.” kevin almost likes jacob even more knowing this. he’s never had anyone in his life who truly understood his insomnia, but jacob does. he feels comforted at this thought. 

 

“was tonight especially bad for you too?” jacob gazes at kevin sympathetically. 

 

“yeah that’s why i was getting more coffee.” 

 

“after you buy that...would you like to come over to my apartment?” jacob must notice the panic that flashes in kevin’s eyes because his eyes widen and he starts stuttering. “no no no not like that! i meant we could just watch dumb, cheesy movies or something, since we both can’t sleep anyways.” 

 

kevin can hardly even admire how cute jacob is when he’s flustered because he’s too embarrassed that he jumped to such a conclusion. _get it together, kevin._

 

jacob already paid for his cereal so kevin just quickly makes his way to the aisle with coffee and grabs his favorite kind. he feels bad for the cashier, she looks like she could fall asleep on the job if she really wanted to. _i should get a job like that, since i can hardly sleep anyways,_ kevin thinks. 

 

“have a good night...or morning... or whatever it even is.” the cashier tries to sound cheerful but she just sounds extremely done. 

 

kevin meets jacob by the doors and jacob gives him his address, which kevin types into his phone. he decides to drop off the coffee first (and drink some) so they plan to meet up at jacob’s apartment. 

 

 

 

as kevin drinks a cup of the coffee he tries to calm down his nerves about going to jacob’s apartment. like he said, we’re just going to be watching movies, it’s going to be fine. he takes a deep breath and opens the door to leave his apartment.

 

 

jacob is already with a newly opened box of cereal when he lets kevin in. jacob flops onto the couch and turns on the tv. “what do you want to watch?”

 

“like you said, something dumb and cheesy.” kevin joins him on the couch. 

 

jacob smiles, “high school musical?” 

 

“oh my god, yes.” 

 

 

“i used to play basketball,” jacob comments during “get your head in the game” 

 

“troy bolton who?” 

 

“that’s what i’m saying!”

 

“now you just need to show everyone your musical talent.” 

 

“actually about that... i’ve been working on a song and i wanted your opinion on it.” 

 

“show me right now!” kevin stands up. 

 

“not now!” jacob protests, laughing and pulling kevin back down. “i still need to record a demo.” 

 

kevin pouts and jacob just smiles and shakes his head, turning back to the movie. 

 

“why are they all so annoying?” 

 

“for real... gabriella always got on my nerves,” kevin agrees.

 

“why do i enjoy it though? it’s so cheesy.” 

 

“you said you wanted to watch cheesy!” 

 

“i think that’s why actually. it’s nice to just watch something not so serious.” 

 

kevin understands. with all the stress in life it’s sometimes just good to watch something fun that you don’t have to put much thought into. 

 

“sharpay reminds me of a mean version of chanhee,” kevin comments. 

 

jacob laughs quietly at this. “you two have known each other for quite a while, right?” 

 

kevin nods. “since elementary school.” 

 

“sunwoo and i just met last year and even though it might not seem like it, we’re pretty close. he helped me during lots of difficult times.” 

 

“i think sunwoo is okay with me, actually. he apologized the other day.” 

 

jacob’s eyes widen. “really?” 

 

kevin nods. 

 

“he must really like you then, you must have made a good impression.” jacob says, looking impressed. 

 

“i’m glad. i understand why he’s overprotective though, chanhee tends to be overprotective as well.” 

 

“it’s a best friends thing,” jacob agrees. 

 

“if we don’t go on stage someday and sing a dramatic high school musical duet then what’s even the point?” jacob points towards troy and gabriella singing a duet on the tv. 

 

“maybe if you’d send me your song.” 

 

“i just told you about it and you already won’t leave me alone!” 

 

“because i want to hear your pretty voice.” 

 

“oh?” 

 

kevin ignores the lump in his throat and continues. “yeah, you have a really good voice, i told you that before.” there’s a moment of silence and kevin wishes another song would come on so he could sing along to break the tension. 

 

“yours is prettier.” jacob says softly.

 

“thank you but... no.” kevin tries not to show how ecstatic jacob’s words make him feel. 

 

“i’m serious kevin, you constantly try to make me see my talent but you have such a gift.” 

 

“i can’t even song write.” 

 

“that’s such a lie, i’ve read your lyrics and they’re beautiful.” 

 

kevin can’t hold back anymore and allows himself a small smile which soon turns into a huge grin. jacob laughs and pulls kevin towards him.

 

“i’ll make you a deal. if i send you my demo, will you work on a song?” 

 

kevin dramatically sighs and jacob giggles.

 

“is that a yes?” 

 

“...yes.” 

 

“we’re all in this together” comes on just then and they both jump to their feet and start singing along and copying the dance. kevin starts screaming ridiculously. 

 

“shhh kevin it’s still super early!” jacob manages to choke out between laughs. 

 

“oops.” 

 

by the end, both boys end up on the floor laughing until it hurts. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is actually one of my favorite chapters i’ve wrote so far


	8. choi chanhee aka the best friend ever

a few days later, kevin awakes from a short nap to a text from jacob with an audio file attached. he quickly connects his earbuds because songs always sound better that way. he can’t help but gasp aloud and his jaw drops. jacob is playing the guitar, as expected. the song is full of mesmerizing analogies for love and impatience. longing pours from the song and it’s so raw that it makes kevin feel hurt even though he knows nothing of what the song is about. _whoever he wrote this for is lucky, he clearly loves them so much._

 

when the song ends kevin doesn’t even know what to say to jacob. after typing and deleting so many paragraphs, he just decides fuck it and completely gushes and hits send. jacob must have been waiting for a response because he replies only several seconds later. 

 

_**jacob:**_ _kevin you have no idea how much all of that means to me, thank you so much for saying all of that <3_

 

the heart makes kevin’s stomach flutter. 

 

_“are you okay though? those lyrics are so full of emotion, is there anything you want to talk about? i’m worried”_ he types. 

 

_**jacob:** thank you but i don’t think it’s something you’d understand, don’t worry about it.  _

**jacob:** _anyways, now you have to make a song too!_

 

kevin was hoping jacob would forget about it, to be honest. especially after hearing jacob’s masterpiece he feels nervous and embarrassed about showing jacob something so vulnerable and personal. _he let me see that side of him though_ , kevin reminds himself. 

 

“ _yeah i’ll work on it sometime,_ ” he replies. 

 

_**jacob:** i can’t wait!!  _

 

he then gets a text from younghoon inviting him to go to the arcade with him so they can get to know each other better. kevin isn’t a huge gamer, but he wants to become closer friends with younghoon so he agrees. 

 

 

they’re having fun, younghoon beats kevin at almost all of the games and they laugh about it. they try to get a cute plushie out of a claw machine about 10 times before just giving up. 

 

“i swear those things are rigged!” kevin complains. 

 

 

younghoon tells kevin about his boyfriend, who’s from another school. kevin wonders when he’ll love someone that much who’ll love him back. he also tells kevin about his passion for singing. they can both connect over their love for music, and they talk about their dreams to perform in the future. 

 

“i’m really shy and insecure about my singing,” younghoon admits. 

 

“me too, but i’m sure you’re very talented and if there’s ever anything i can do to support you, let me know,” kevin responds. 

 

“same goes for you.” 

 

kevin is glad that chanhee and changmin introduced him to younghoon because he can tell they’re going to be really good friends. everything is going great until he hears a familiar laugh from a game a few feet across the room. kevin glances over and sees jacob and sangyeon. jacob is just as breathtaking as always, he reminds kevin of the sun. sangyeon is also near perfect, which is part of why he’s so popular at school. 

 

“how are you so good at this?” jacob whines. sangyeon glances over at jacob and laughs. 

 

“we have to go,” kevin whispers to younghoon through gritted teeth. 

 

younghoon follows his gaze. “is that him?” 

 

kevin only nods while younghoon guides him out of the building. he feels like the image of sangyeon laughing and looking at jacob with so much affection is always going to be engraved in the back of his brain and he suddenly feels exhausted. 

 

“kevin i’m really sorry.” 

 

they’re just sitting in younghoon’s car now. 

 

“it’s not your fault at all, neither of us could have known and i had fun anyways.” 

 

“i’m glad. i had fun too, and whatever you saw might not mean anything, i wouldn’t overthink.” 

 

_ too late for that. _

 

“it all adds up though,” kevin replies quietly. 

 

“but they could just be friends, like you and i.” younghoon offers. when kevin doesn’t respond he asks, “do you want me to tell chanhee to go to your apartment?” 

 

kevin doesn’t want to say yes because he doesn’t want to seem like the stupid, weak boy who can’t handle his feelings on his own but chanhee always knows what to do to make him feel better. 

 

“that would be nice, thank you.” 

 

 

chanhee is already waiting inside kevin’s apartment with several grocery bags when kevin arrives. he has a spare key to kevin’s apartment incase anything were to ever happen. as soon as kevin steps in, chanhee runs over and gently hugs him. 

 

“why don’t you go lay down, i brought a blanket you can use. i also bought all kinds of food, you can choose whatever you want.” 

 

“chanhee, all of this isn’t necessary. i just wanted to see you.” 

 

“yes it is, my best friend needs me and i need to do my best to help.” 

 

“i don’t deserve you.” 

 

“stop being sappy and pick a food!!” chanhee smiles.

 

kevin chooses mint chocolate chip ice cream first. chanhee turns on a comedy show on netflix and moves up onto the couch and wraps himself around kevin. they spend hours going through the food chanhee bought and kevin finds himself laughing at the show and starting to feel better. he feels bad that chanhee had to spend his day like this, but he never seems to mind. chanhee is always so eager to take care of kevin and kevin wishes there was some way he could make it up to chanhee. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is kind of short oops but i want a friend like chanhee


	9. the perfect gift

jacob’s birthday party is tomorrow and kevin is on a mission. he has a bit of money saved up and he’s determined to buy the best birthday present ever. 

 

it’s a cold day for the summertime, but not cold enough to be irritating. it’s lightly raining when kevin walks into the mall and the sky is pale grey and foggy. although many people hate this type of weather, he finds it calming and pleasant. the mall is always bright and full of all kinds of people, the moment kevin enters it he is tempted by the distinct scent of starbucks. he caves and buys an iced americano, mentally cursing coffee for smelling so good. 

 

he doesn’t know exactly what he wants to get jacob yet so he wanders into a music store. kevin can’t help but smile as soon as he lays eyes on all the instruments and equipment and people who are fond of music just like him. there is a plethora of guitars on the walls, but jacob’s guitar is already really nice, and kevin knows how much jacob loves it. kevin walks around the rest of the store, getting distracted briefly by a piano. it’s almost as if the keys are magnets that his fingers are drawn to. he plays a few songs from memory, earning applause from some of the other customers. he shyly stands up and continues looking for a gift. he wants jacob to love it, so it needs to be perfect. kevin tells himself that it’s because jacob has become one of his closest friends and he wants to make his friend happy, but he knows inside that it’s more than that. 

 

kevin is getting discouraged when he spots recording equipment and suddenly he’s grinning and rushing over to it. _jacob doesn’t have nice, proper recording equipment yet and he’s working on making songs, this will be perfect._

 

the equipment isn’t cheap, but kevin can afford it and it doesn’t bother him to spend money on jacob. 

 

“you seem awfully excited about this,” the cashier notes. 

 

“oh... yeah,” kevin responds, feeling embarrassed. 

 

“are you the one that’s going to be using it?” 

 

“no, it’s a gift for my friend actually.” 

 

the cashier looks impressed, “that is one lucky friend, when i was your age none of my friends would willingly spend that much money on me.” 

 

kevin doesn’t know how to respond to this so he just shrugs and thanks the cashier. 

 

 

as soon as he gets back to his apartment, he texts the group chat with chanhee, changmin and younghoon, telling them how proud he is about his gift. despite not even knowing what the gift is (kevin refuses to tell them until the party) the boys all hype kevin. 

 

“that’s my boy!” chanhee says.

 

“go get him kevin!!” changmin and younghoon cheer him on. 

 

kevin is in a good mood so he turns on some beyonce and gets to work. he wraps the gift himself in a pretty, soft yellow color and attaches a card.

 

“I noticed that you didn’t have proper recording equipment. I hope you can record your songs better this way because they deserve to be heard in the best quality. I really hope you like it!! -kevin” he writes. he sets the gift on the counter and smiles to himself. 

 

_ tomorrow can’t come any faster.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this updates really short again but omg there’s probably only going to be a few chapters left of this fic


	10. it’s you

for jacob’s party, he rents a lake house. it’s already full of people dancing to music on the speakers and consuming whatever they can find when kevin arrives. kevin sets his gift on the table where all of the other gifts are and looks around the room for jacob. he spots the blonde quickly. jacob is pulling another boy away from the drinks on the counter. 

 

“hyunjae, that’s enough of that already the party barely even started.” 

 

the other boy, apparently named hyunjae, is clearly already drunk and he pouts but listens to jacob and wanders off. 

 

jacob turns to kevin with an exasperated expression, “i’m so glad you’re here now.” 

 

“i told you i’d never miss it!” 

 

“i shouldn’t have put out drinks, we’re going to be the only sober ones by the end of this.” 

 

“that’s okay, i’m used to taking care of changmin and chanhee”. 

 

jacob nods, “same with sunwoo and haknyeon.” 

 

“JACOB WHERE DO I PUT THIS?” eric sprints over, juyeon by his side as always ever since they made it official. 

 

jacob points to the table where the many other gifts are and eric throws the gift like its a basketball. kevin and jacob both wince and eric laughs, “don’t worry it’s nothing fragile.” 

 

“i swear eric never left the second grade.” kevin comments. 

 

jacob nods in agreement. 

 

“you should open my gift.” kevin suggests. 

 

“i wasn’t going to open them until after the party, but if you really want me to open it now i can, which one is it?” 

 

“the one with yellow wrapping.” 

 

jacob picks up the gift and tears the card off. his smile grows wider the more he reads the card. 

 

“you didn’t!” he says, already ripping the wrapping paper off of the gift. he can’t help but jump in excitement. “this has to be a joke!” 

 

“i hope you like it,” kevin smiles. 

 

“kevin are you serious? no one has ever gotten me this nice of a gift before, i love it!” jacob rushes forward and hugs kevin tightly, lifting him off of the ground slightly and spinning him around. 

 

kevin desperately tries to fight off the blush rising in his cheeks when a few of their friends give them looks. 

 

they part ways for a while, and kevin enthusiastically tells changmin chanhee and younghoon about how well it went. 

 

“i told you there was still a chance!” younghoon insists. 

 

“i really don’t know anymore...why is he so hard to read?” kevin sighs.

 

“tell me about it.” chanhee glances at changmin.

 

“shut up,” changmin lightly hits his boyfriend. 

 

“anyways, i’m sure things will come together eventually,” chanhee says. 

 

“i hope so.” 

 

“do you guys wanna go get drinks?” changmin suggests, earning cheers from chanhee and younghoon. 

 

“oh god, here we go again,” kevin mutters. 

 

“kevin are you coming with?” 

 

“i’m good,” kevin is already glancing around to find someone new to talk to. 

 

despite the fact that many people are staring at him, including hyunjae, hyunjoon is standing alone. kevin makes eye contact with him and waves. hyunjoon smiles and makes his way over. 

 

“kevin! i was just going to find you, i wanted to tell you that i got an offer from a company, i’m going to be modeling finally!” 

 

“hyunjoon, thats great! i can see why.” 

 

hyunjoon is always well-dressed, especially at parties. the key point of this outfit, in kevin’s opinion, is the thick studded choker. 

 

“thank you!” hyunjoon smiles. “any progress with jacob?”

 

“maybe? i honestly can’t tell.” 

 

hyunjoon nods. “at least you might have something, i can’t relate.” 

 

“there was a guy staring at you earlier,” kevin motions to where hyunjae is. 

 

“that guy is shit-faced, kevin, he probably doesn’t even know who he’s staring at anymore.” 

 

“it’s worth a try, maybe he’ll want to see you again when he’s sober.” 

 

hyunjoon shrugs and gives kevin a small smile before confidently making his way over to hyunjae, who can’t hide his surprise at the sight of hyunjoon. 

 

kevin laughs softly and looks around the room for changmin chanhee and younghoon, who are nowhere to be seen. _i should have been watching them_ he thinks regretfully. jacob is across the room talking to sangyeon and kevin doesn’t want to interrupt them so he just pretends to be extra fascinated in the wall. he feels a hand on his shoulder and whips around to see jacob behind him. 

 

“kevin what are you doing?” 

 

“you were talking to sangyeon so i didn’t want to interrupt you.” 

 

jacob doesn’t say anything and just takes kevin’s hand and leads him outside. kevin is extremely confused, but he doesn’t protest because he definitely doesn’t mind this. there’s no one else outside and it gives kevin chills. 

 

“i need to talk to you about something...about sangyeon actually.” 

 

“honestly, its kind of irritating that you guys haven’t started dating yet, if you both like each other then what’s the point of waiting.” 

 

“i don’t like sangyeon, kevin.” 

 

kevin can’t hide his surprise. “what?? why on earth not? he’s nice and good-looking and popular and he clearly likes you.” 

 

“because i like someone else.” 

 

_great, now i have to worry about ANOTHER guy_ kevin thinks. 

 

“i like....” jacob pauses, “fuck it i can’t do this.” he turns to leave.

 

kevin grabs his wrist, stopping him. “hey, it’s okay. you can tell me anything.” 

 

jacob takes a deep breath and turns back towards kevin. “it’s you... fuck... i’m sorry this is going to mess up everything.” he already turns to run back inside. 

 

kevin’s brain is short-circuiting and he can hardly process what just happened but he knows that he can’t let jacob leave yet. he pulls the other boy towards him so they’re only inches apart, making jacob gasp. before he can even think, he closes the gap. jacob is quick to respond and he tastes even sweeter than kevin has imagined. kevin gently tilts jacob’s chin, deepening the kiss. jacob lifts kevin up and they move to the deck stairs, jacob’s hands tangled in kevin’s bright hair. kevin can’t help but laugh when they pull away because how in the world did he end up like this? he just kissed the boy he always thought would never like him and now he’s sitting in that same boy’s lap on the deck stairs of the lake house that boy rented out for his birthday. life just tends to be crazy like that. 

 

“what?” jacob asks nervously. 

 

“nothing it’s just that i was so worried about sangyeon and look at us,” kevin grins.

 

jacob smiles, “i told sangyeon how i felt and he was chill about it, we’re friends and i think you guys could be friends too.” 

 

“that’d be nice!” 

 

“so... what do you think about going on a coffee date sometime?” 

 

“wasn’t what i just did enough of an answer for you?” 

 

“i didn’t know!!” 

 

“jacob bae, you are a dumbass.” 

 

“what kind of way to treat your boyfriend is that, kevin moon?” 

 

“my boyfriend... you’re my boyfriend... that feels really nice to say.” 

 

“oh my god shut up and let’s go inside.” jacob pushes kevin off of him. 

 

“you’re blushing!!” kevin grins proudly. this makes jacob turn an even deeper shade of red. he takes kevin’s hand and they go back inside and dance to the music that is still blasting from the speakers. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really hope you guys like this since it’s sort of the most important part of the story i also felt bad about the way i wrote sangyeon so i wanted to fix things between jacob kevin and sangyeon! also hyunjae was finally introduced


	11. dreams coming true

a few years later, kevin and jacob are graduated from college and are about to have their first performance together. they have been writing music together ever since they first started dating, but this is their first opportunity to actually perform them for an audience other than their friends and the dog they adopted. everyone is there: chanhee, changmin, younghoon, sunwoo, haknyeon, sangyeon,eric, juyeon, hyunjoon, and hyunjae. they’ve become a close group of friends, and they’e always doing something that could be categorized as “dumbass” together. sangyeon, jacob, and kevin hang out often. sangyeon has moved on from jacob and has a boyfriend who he says kevin and jacob have to meet soon. hyunjoon always thanks kevin for encouraging him to talk to hyunjae at jacob’s birthday party since the two are dating now. it makes kevin the happiest to see his friends accomplishing their dreams and having someone to love and support them. 

 

“kevin are you nervous?” kevin feels warm arms wrap around him from behind. jacob rests his head on kevin’s shoulder.

 

“of course i am,” kevin admits.

 

“we got this! just think, we have 10 friends out there supporting us, that’s better than lots of people can say.” jacob is right, they’re lucky. kevin often wonders whether he deserves it all. 

 

they are told to go on stage whenever they’re ready. kevin and jacob look at each other, intertwine their hands and take a deep breath. they are greeted with cheers as soon as they are bathed in the bright stage lights. kevin grins and glances over at jacob, who is also smiling brightly. they perform their entire set without any mistakes and by the end of it kevin is feeling comfortable enough to do some little dances which make the crowd laugh and jacob smile fondly. the sight of all the different types of people in the crowd smiling, applauding, yelling, and waving their phone flashlights brings kevin to tears. jacob immediately notices and rushes over to kevin. 

 

“what’s wrong? are you okay?” jacob frantically asks. 

 

“i’m okay i’m okay i’m just so happy.” kevin sniffles, hiding his face. jacob begins to cry too, because he can’t believe he’s getting to perform with his boyfriend and it’s all so overwhelming. this makes the crowd go “awww” 

 

when they take their bows the audience goes wild, especially their friends who scream obnoxiously. 

 

“kevin you made me cry!!” jacob pouts when they get backstage. 

 

“kinda cute how worried you got.” 

 

“shut up.” despite the fact that kevin teases jacob like this on the daily, it still makes the blonde flustered. 

 

“how could i not cry though? this is all i ever wanted to do and now i’m getting to do it with you. do i even deserve this?” 

 

“of course you deserve this, no one works as hard as you do staying up writing lyrics or playing the piano or practicing. i wish you could see that.” 

 

kevin is about to kiss jacob right then and there for saying that but before he can their friends come barreling in. 

 

“THATS MY BEST FRIEND!!” chanhee yells. 

 

“AND MINE!” sunwoo adds.

 

“kevin i remember when you told me you were insecure about performing... how could you ever doubt yourself with that kind of talent?” younghoon says.

 

“jacob always used to say that too,” sunwoo sighs.

 

“kevin and jacob stop lying challenge,” changmin rolls his eyes.

 

“the crowd loved you guys!!” hyunjoon smiles. 

 

“the person next to me was going OFF during that one song.” eric agrees.

 

“can we take a group picture? i want a picture with celebrities,” hyunjae jokes. 

 

“we can use my phone,” haknyeon offers. 

 

he sets it on top of a box and sets a timer so that they can all be in the photo. the 12 boys gather around and pose a few times. 

 

“i’ll send it to you guys,” haknyeon says.

 

they all have a huge group chat now. it blows up kevin’s phone constantly, but he never complains. he loves them all.

 

kevin glances over at jacob, trying to communicate through his eyes. jacob nods, “kevin and i are going to get now.” 

 

the 12 boys say their goodbyes for the night and congratulate kevin and jacob on their performance again. 

 

kevin and jacob’s nights mostly consist of cuddling and trying to help each other sleep, and maybe watching some cheesy movie if their efforts fail. and that’s exactly how this night goes. they lay down in bed in their apartment and play with each other’s hair. usually, they eventually fall asleep this way. kevin thinks he falls asleep much faster with jacob but maybe it’s all just in his head. he does know that theirs nothing he likes better than waking up with jacob’s hands tangled in his hair, though. even with his messy bed head and bare face, jacob is still just as beautiful as he was that night in the kitchen and that night at eric’s party. it sounds crazy but kevin is so glad that his insomnia drove him to wander downstairs and he is so grateful that jacob thought he was a ghost and threw a spoon at him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay soooo that concludes this fic!! thank u so much for bearing with me writing my first ever full fic i know it was messy at parts but i hope i can improve when i write more fics in the future!


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